It might be because in their minds they are satisfied with the way things are.

It might be they are scared to rock the boat, any boat- their boat or someone else’s boat.

It might be personal fear of the unknown…it’s so much safer just to leave things as they are. This is a known life and we really don’t know what something different would look like. We won’t take the risk.

It might be some form of deception, self talk, self-assessment that assures me “I’m already Ok”, but the OK is lacking scrutiny. What is the “ok-ness” based on?

Just look back for a few minutes and see where you’ve come from in the past 12 months. Is it

• a straight line
• a crooked line
• no line at all
• a circle

Have you a dream, any dream for the future? I do! I’m 60, not young but certainly not old. Someone once said, ‘when you stop dreaming you start dying.” If that’s true, lots of good people are dying long before they are dead.

I’m working on a new 5-year plan right now. Why not? I’ll likely live much more than 5 more years, God willing, so what will I do with the next 5 years?

What if that is my last 5 years, what do I really want to get done for God’s glory? If I’m going to live another 5 years why not make it count? Why drift because I’m 60, or because I’ve already done a lot, or because my back aches occasionally and my knees get stiff and I don’t always sleep well. So what! I’m alive and I should live life to the full.

You might be only 30 and so locked into career-building you’ve forgotten to live- to do more than earn money. Don’t you want to leave a mark, to make a difference? Remember, in just a few years you too will be 60.

Looking forward means looking at your life with your eyes wide open and see where it’s going. Based on the past year and the mindset you have today where will you be in 2013? Is that really where you want to be in life? Is that all you want to be? Is your current life the end of all dreams?

Dream with God. Yes- you read it right. Dream with God. He is the author of dreams and visions. Have you really considered God’s purpose for your life? His purpose may have absolutely nothing to do with your career, business, routines or experience.

Too often we offer to God what we are rather than who we are. “Lord, I’m good at marketing, I studied 4 years for this degree, can you use my skills?” Maybe He can! Or…maybe he doesn’t want to! Maybe he has a dream for you that has nothing to do with the security you’ve built. Instead, it will need faith- pure trust in God to see it come to pass.

Looking forward means you are optimistic. Optimism is to weak a word for Christians. It should be looking forward full of faith. I can do and I will do because I believe in God’s promises and I intend to see them come to pass in my life.

Optimism is hopefulness and confidence about the future. Faith is an assurance that what is presently not right or seen will be right or seen. Based upon my faith in God, “I know.”

Looking forward is action. If we continue to do what we’ve done before we can expect the same results. Are you satisfied with the results? Is this all you have ever dreamt of? Was last year the fulfillment of your dreams? Was it the beginning of where you know God wants you to Go? I should clarify that: when I say, “where God wants you to go” I don’t mean a geographic position. I mean where, personally, in character, ability, accomplishment and spiritual life He wants you to go.

Make it personal. Big dreams start inside. You change- and everything around you changes. Mostly we want circumstances and others to change… but real change starts with us.

I recently read the following in a blog by Glen Beck and I recopy.

A man decided that he would change the world.
But, he wasn’t successful.
So he decided to change the country.
But, he wasn’t successful.
So he decided to change his community.
But, he wasn’t successful.
So he decided to change his street.
But, be wasn’t successful.
So he decided to change his family.
But, he wasn’t successful.
So he decided to change himself.
AND HE WAS SUCCESSFUL.
AND HIS FAMILY CHANGED AND THEY AFFECTED THEIR STREET.
AND THE PEOPLE ON THE STREET AFFECTED THEIR COMMUNITY.
AND THE PEOPLE OF THE COMMUNITY AFFECTED THEIR COUNTRY.
AND THE PEOPLE OF THE COUNTRY AFFECTED THE WORLD.

Looking forward is an excellent way to begin 2012. Take an hour this week and get alone and write down some dreams and plans and faith statements. Start talking to God about them. Write down some things you could do to clarify where you want to go. Then take actions that move you in that direction and do so with excitement.

I actually expect my next 5 years to be my best so far, but possibly not as good as the 5 years after that, and the five years after that… J

Happy New Year!

Maybe I should ask you the question, “Have you become bored with church, ministry, or Christian life?”

There is a phrase children learn from stories: “they lived happily ever after”. The Christian life, and everything after, is often not very “happy ever after.” Why not?

Everything done as “ministry to God” must be for the love of Christ. You must fall in love with Jesus- forever! There is absolutely no other valid reason for any church involvement or Christian activity.

Well, there are other reasons… they are just not acceptable to God.

Ministry to God has 2 distinct aspects. First there is ministry TO God, such as prayer and worship. Then there is ministry FOR God, which is man-ward- that we call service or ministry activity. We separate them for definition purposes but Biblically there is no difference. Everything in a Christian’s life is about God.

There is no separation between these two. Ministry to God in worship and prayer is lived out through service. The motive for service or ministry is the same as for worship and prayer. We love God, I might add, with all our heart, mind, and soul…as Jesus defined it.

To live a life where everything is about God is to show the world that “Jesus is Lord”.

He owns me. I’m dedicated to Him. I love God. I live for Him. I will do anything I can to help Him or His kingdom.

Those few lines express the Lordship of Christ in my life.

If these words do not express your life too, then Jesus is not Lord of your life in any practical way and- yes! boredom is just around the corner.

Interestingly, ministry is never to be a mere human activity. It was always meant to be motivated and empowered by the Holy Spirit- this is a joint operation. The New Testament church prayed and worshipped and then went out and changed the world!

From time to time I come across Christian leaders and workers who are bored with ministry. Here’s their whining refrain… “I need a change, I don’t get anything out of this any more. It’s all the same dull old stuff…I am bored with it all…..”

Some of this is due to the spirit of the age. The universal spirit of restlessness has overtaken mankind. Humans are restless, much like children with new toys. Quickly tired of them. New technology. Television commercials every 10 minutes. In and out of relationships. Marriage commitments in decline. Some even express boredom with their wife or husband- (as if you marry to be excited all the time). Sex is available without commitment, almost at an animal level. Sorry to say, this state of affairs (pun intended) exists even among some Christians.

The spirit of the time is restlessness. It is anti-commitment, anti-love, anti-God, anti-humility, anti-service. In fact, service is now an industry, not a function of a heart full of decency and love!

All of the above may explain some reasons for boredom.

Fundamental to boredom and restlessness is “misguided spirituality”. Loving God is the basis for loving people. Worship of God is the basis for serving people. If you do it “unto one of the least of these, you do it to me…” Jesus said. All service communicated through love for Christ is supernaturally effective, because that kind of love is only possible empowered by the Holy Spirit.

Bring truly alive is having a living, relevant relationship with God. If you are bored with service, ministry, church, or the pastor, I can say with about 99.9% certainty that you have left your first love for Christ. Somewhere in your life you have separated what you do for people and the church with what you do for the love of Jesus. Therein is the problem.

“A new church will certainly help…” you might say.

Really? In what way? Oh, it will allow you to keep your eyes off of the real problem for a little while longer. You can become engaged in newness again- remember the spirit of the age – restlessness? Shifting churches from time to time is excellent at keeping the real demons at bay.

However, eventually you just won’t find a church that does it for you and you’ll start skipping and slipping and missing and eventually the missing and slipping and skipping is more than the attending and then…..the honeymoon is over. You never even saw it coming! You blamed everyone else for how you felt and now it’s only you and maybe a few other disgruntled folks who feel the same.

Back to the point. Who can separate us from the love of Christ? Rhetorical question! Obviously no one and nothing! He never stops loving! So if our love, passion and joy has depleted, then who left whom?

Brother, sister, watch that boredom… it’s the first sign of misguided spirituality.

The answer is to turn back to God with all your heart. Take a day or week or a year off to pray and read your Bible and fall in love with Jesus all over again.

Run to God before you become a statistic!

Remember: true love knows no boredom. It is possible to live happily ever after- with Jesus!

The world is not the same as it once was.

There was a time when professionals were looked up to as having integrity. The stockbroker really worked for you. The lawyer represented you. The pastor or minister lived what he preached. There really were people who loved to serve others.

Now service is an industry, a profession.

Somewhere in this high-pressure world, trust crashed.

Now the indictments have come for those perpetrating Ponzi schemes, and defrauding folks of their hard earned savings.

Television preachers have often embarrassed the Christian community.

Priests have been found out to be less than moral.

Salesman no longer sell for the love of the product, but only for what they can earn on commissions.

Good upright people still do exist! But for many casualties of this unreliable world, there does not seem to be any one left to trust.

For a few moments lets flip this around and stop thinking about our trust betrayed, and start thinking about becoming a person of trust. Rather than surrendering to the way it is, why not become someone who can be trusted? Become the very kind of person you are looking for.

Can you be trusted, verbally, morally, financially or spiritually? True trust is never given; it is earned. If you start working on it today, you can become a trustworthy person.

I want to give you 4 very simple qualities that can increase your trust quotient in life and relationships.

1. Be consistent. Keep saying the same thing. Stay on your course in life. Never let your life become situationally moral. Be moral all the time. Stay on track. Let it be known you are consistent. Stay with it!
2. Be a person of integrity. Let words and actions be exactly the same. Never say one thing privately and another publically. Never smile at someone while you curse him under your breath. Get a grip on your life and be the same inside and out. Don’t forget little things count. Pay attention to your own behavior!
3. Be dependable. Stand with people. Be a friend to people. Be more than an employee or employer. Be there for others when they need you. Now that normally costs you something- do it anyway! Go that second mile for someone and be prepared to do it often. Determine to leave deposits of good in other’s lives. Jimmy Johnson, former football coach says it this way;” the only thing worse than a coach or CEO who doesn’t care about his people is one who pretends to care.” People can spot a phony every time. They know he doesn’t care about them and worse, his actions insult their intelligence. Be reliable!
4. Be a promise keeper. When you say something, follow through on it. When you make a commitment, don’t expect someone to follow you up. I’ve been told we live in the “day of follow-up”. When you make a promise why should someone else have to hold you to it? You should just do it because you promised to do it. Nowadays, “trying” seems to be the standard. “I tried”, but it didn’t work. Winston Churchill said, “It’s no use saying ‘We did our best.’” You have got to succeed at doing what is necessary. Keep those promises!

Friends, you do these 4 things and your trust quotient is going to go through the roof. These four character traits, when broken, define what hurts and disappoints us the most.

Therefore logically and practically if we want to be trusted, that is a choice we make today. It is set in motion the moment we begin to practice these 4 things.

Following may be what you have done most of your life- but it does not mean that you are limited to following.

The assumption is that leadership is about personality.

There are many classifications of personalities. The simplest description I know of are these four: choleric, sanguine, melancholy and phlegmatic.

The choleric is the aggressive outgoing, outspoken type.

The sanguine the people person, friendly and cheerful.

The melancholy the deep thinker and feeler and sometimes the artist.

The phlegmatic the quiet, withdrawn, soft-spoken, seemingly unmotivated type.

There are combinations and variations of these four personality types, but most of us have one of the four as our dominant personality

So which one makes a good leader?

Surprise! They all do.

Each personality has strengths and weaknesses. The choleric may be aggressive but comes across as too pushy. The sanguine, being happy and cheerful, may be viewed as shallow. The melancholy, while gifted and deep, may seem too moody. The easy-going phlegmatic may appear lazy or unmotivated.

Yet they all can make excellent leaders.

That is because leadership is about influence, not personality. It’s about using that influence to cause something to happen.

Leadership is a learned skill, not a personality type.

Every successful leader has developed those skills. He may not be able to tell you where he learned it or what book he read. It may have even been trial and error or lots of failures.

But if a leader is succeeding, he learned it somewhere.

What is remarkable is a leadership style is often colored by a personality, making each leader, whether choleric, sanguine, melancholy, or phlegmatic, completely unique.

“But why should I bother to learn to be a leader?”

I’ll tell you why. The world is miserable, disorganized, failing, completely without answers. Morals are in decay. Families are suffering. Office politics cripple many organizations and governments.

Do you get the picture? It’s a mess!

The world, the church, the government, the home, needs leaders.

Leaders do something about what is wrong. They look for ways to move forward. They choose change, because they understand that if things stay the same, the results will be the same.

Are you totally happy with all the results you get in your life and career?

My simple plan to develop your inborn leadership ability

1. Start dreaming about what you could do right where you are, in your circle of influence.  Dream about how you could make things better. Have some faith in who you are and how God made you.
2. Lead yourself. Leaders must lead themselves first. A few disciplines are in order. Moods, thinking and personal life must be disciplined. Model good positive behavior. People pay attention to that. They follow that.
3. Speak up. Leaders must speak to be heard. You have a lot of “gold” inside that no one sees. Offer good positive suggestions when you have them. When you see a problem, force your mind to think of solutions. You may be surprised how many solutions are locked inside your head if you really thought about it.
4. Take the initiative when you can. Don’t always wait for someone else to do it- you do it. Don’t always wait to be asked. What’s the worst thing that could happen? You might fail. Truthfully, you’ve failed before and you may again. How refreshing to think: “this time I failed trying to make a difference.”
5. Try new things. Fear is most often overcome by facing it head on and going in that direction. Step out of the boat.
6. Be yourself. You do not need to change your personality to be leadership material. The sanguine leader is still a sanguine but a disciplined sanguine. The choleric is still a choleric but a disciplined choleric.

So why not become a leader?

If you have any desire at all to make a difference, you can learn how to do it. I can even recommend some great books for you to read.

Go for it and start today.

You can become a leader!

In fact, some people do not love any work at all. A recent American survey found that 11% of those surveyed believed that the government should provide you with a basic income whether you work or not.

If you think work and jobs are rough today, just read the article below on the rules of the workplace in 1852.
These were found in the ruins of an old factory in Scotland:

All employees must abide by the following regulations:
* This firm has reduced the hours of work, and the clerical staff will now only have to be present between the hours of 7 a.m. and 6 p.m.
* Daily prayers will be held each morning in the main office. The clerical staff will be present.
* Clothing must be of sober nature. The clerical staff will not disport themselves in raiment of bright colors.
* A stove is provided for the benefit of the clerical staff. Coal and wood must be kept in the locker. It is recommended that each member of the clerical staff bring four pounds of coal each day during cold weather.
* No member of the clerical staff may leave the room without permission from Mr. Rogers. The calls of nature are permitted and clerical staff may use the garden below the second gate. This area must be kept in good order.
* No talking is allowed during business hours.
* The craving of tobacco, wines, and spirits is a human weakness and as such is forbidden to all members of the clerical staff.
* Now that the hours of business have been drastically reduced, the partaking of food is allowed between 11:30 a.m. and noon, but work will not on any account cease.
* The owners recognize the generosity of the new Labor Laws, but will expect a great rise in output of work in compensation for these near Utopian conditions.

How would you like to work in THAT factory???

Today, work is a lot easier, and yet often considered a burden, a necessary evil or treated like a curse- something we hate but must do…for the money.

I should pause here and say, if you only work for the money you’ll never be very good at your work. You can never pay anyone enough to bring excellence to his work.

Work has never been easy. The very word itself has synonymous meanings like effort, exertion, labor, toil, slog, drudgery, or grind.
In my opinion every job, business or profession becomes “work” if done well. Effort is needed. Attitude is essential. The daily grind is there.

Anything done repeatedly can become boring and monotonous. But it can be rewarding.

Some of you might think working for Jesus would be an easy job. As one young man once said to me, “Everything I’ve tried has failed, I guess God is calling me to the ministry.”

What was he thinking, people in ministry have no bad days or never fight negative feelings?

The best job or easiest profession becomes “work” very soon. Rarely does a job alone make you happy.
In actual fact, no work can make you happy. In my lifetime I’ve talked to a lot of people in a lot of positions and many levels of society.

Happy people are usually happier at work. They are also happier at home and happier in relationships.

The point I want to make about work is simple. We all have to work at life.

Life is relationships, jobs, ministry or business.

Don’t let life define you by your responsibilities. Don’t let your mundane job make you a mundane person.

Choose to leave a mark on your work and your life.

Make your purposeful impression on everything you do by being a Christian.

Be different in the workplace by being the best you can be in that place for the glory of God. Do business in a way that would make Jesus notice you are there.

You will have to work or as the Scripture says be content with poverty.

Love your work.

“What?” you protest. “My work? You don’t know how bad it is.”

No I don’t; but I’m pretty sure that no job is ever all bad. And no job is ever all good.

Choose to Love your work by…
• Having a good positive attitude every day.
• Arrive 10 minutes early, every day, rather than 10 minutes late.
• Speak positively about your bosses and work mates.
• Learn to do it better- improve yourself.
• Place your personal signature on your work and call it excellence.
• Never do the minimum- give it that extra push.
• Sing once in awhile at work.
• Smile as often as you can and to as many people as you can.

Just be a spirit filled Christian and the joy will spill over and work will be fun.

The “fear factor” plays a much bigger role in our lives than most of us would care to admit.

Isn’t that often what’s really driving us?

Fear!

As ugly as the word is, yet it is one of the great realities of life. The child wakes up dreaming of imaginary monsters triggered by some emotion in his day. The adult, having left childhood dreams of monsters, may still face those familiar fears in different dreams, but still the same- fear driven by things he cannot control.

We still have some of those monsters. Waking up in a panic. Then wondering, “Where did that come from?”

Then possibly we become aware that it is connected to something that struck us emotionally during the day.

Sometimes simply making that connection dissipates the fearful emotion.

With bad dreams, it’s not the dream itself that may mean something, rather the fear it represents or stirs up.

Familiar fears- those things drive us, push us, manipulate us, and at times paralyze us. They cause over-reactions to normal life circumstances, withdrawal from situations that for others would mean nothing.

It is those emotions than often consume great amounts of energy to suppress.

How can this be, that people who believe in Jesus can have fears?

This is some kind of paradox.

To know an all-powerful God and yet be personally afraid? Just the concept of an all-powerful God should be enough to still our fears, shouldn’t it?

Realistically it does not always do so.

Most children fear the dark. As years pass, so does that fear- for most people.

However, life brings other fears. We learn new ones or connect new forms of old fears. It may be the fear of committing to a relationship, fear of acceptance, fear of sickness, fear of failure in career, fear of losing control.

As age keeps coming, fear of aging, fear of being retired, or not sure of your value as an old person.

Finally, for many, but not just the aged, the fear of death.

My point is that fears drive far too much of life for most people.

Fearlessness is much less common than you think.

Many of the people who appear to be fearless are not; their activity only disguises the fears behind the defiant faces.

The question I put for us today is this: “how much of your life, decisions or relationships are controlled or driven by fear? That is the word- “driven”. For a driven mind is not a mind at rest.

Those underlying fears create anxiety and anxiety can easily begin to dominate our emotions. Soon life has lost its peace.

To this problem there is no easy solution.

Some one, a professional person seeking guidance, said to me a short time ago, “Tell me the indicators when I know God has spoken.”

Almost a scientific term- “indicators”.

Maybe you’d like the indicators and steps to fix the issues of fear.

Realistically, we are not machines that can always be fixed by a shot, pill or prayer. “If I heard God speak it would all be over.” Maybe it would. Maybe it wouldn’t.

Let me first of all say, fear is normal. It is usually based upon something. That something is usually learned. Being frightened by a dog as a child may cause a fear of dogs your whole life.

Some fears are good. Seeing a bus coming at you as you cross the road may create a panic for which your good fear would cause you to jump out of the way. Good response!!

Fears only become a problem when they begin influence our decisions or shape our behavior.

Here are some very simple steps for dealing with fear.

Feel it- allow yourself to feel that fear. It is real. Admit it and define it. “I am afraid of dogs”…”I am afraid of relationships”…“I am afraid of being hurt”…

Find its source – When did this fear start, and why? Ask God to show you the source- the memory. Think about it, pray about it and search for it. If need be, get someone to pray with you to help you track it down.

Face the past. Analyze that fear and how you learned it.

Ask God to heal you right there where it began. Ask Him to speak to you about that situation maybe long ago. He will!

Then and only then can fear be replaced with truth and peace.

Some things cannot be ignored. Ignoring fears may be like taking Paracetemol for an infection. The Paracetemol only hides the infection, it doesn’t cure it.

God can heal your fears.

Faith it – always do the right thing no matter what you fear.

That is courage.

Some of the greatest people in the world are very ordinary; they may even live lives plagued by fear. But in faith they move forward doing what is right. That is great courage.

Faith is trusting God, standing on God’s promises, going forward in spite of what we feel.

I am aware emotions cannot be forgotten nor can memories. Yet we can choose what we think. In that way we can effect our emotions.

Don’t settle for a life controlled by fear. David said, “I sought the Lord and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.”

Feel it: find it: face it: and faith it.

The alternative is to stay like you are forever….to walk in freedom from fear is so much better!

Please share this with anyone who may benefit. If you need help call Church of God Makati, 632 8105366.

You see, I do not believe that all conflict is bad. There are many good things that will not happen without conflict.
If you are one of the many who believe that everything should always be quiet and everyone should always get along, you may be living in a bubble. Truthfully, we all different and therefore think differently. Reason enough for conflict right there.

Some of our more spiritual friends view all conflict as somehow demonic rather that simply humans communicating. This is giving the devil way too much credit.

Just because there are no vocal disagreements does not mean there is no conflict. Everyone may appear happy or at peace- but it may only be a cover. In fact, much stress is caused when people are not allowed to express their negative feelings.

I can think of 3 good things that happen through conflict, 3 signs that conflict has become destructive, and 3 things we could do to improve the outcome of our conflicts.

Conflict forces us to think. Each of us sees life through our own colored glasses. It’s called “perspective”. We assume if no one differs with us, that the way we see it must be right. If we assume we are always right, when disagreement occurs my immediate response is that something must be wrong with “them” and not me. The first thing we should realize in conflict is that there are other ways to look at life rather than just our own.

Conflict actually- and surprisingly- brings us together. When we disagree with honestly, we see another’s heart. Sometimes we learn how they really feel. The emotion expressed may simply be their passionate view on an issue. Most of us are rather insensitive to the feelings of others. We just don’t notice things about people, their feelings and views- until they are upset. Then it is “shock treatment” for us. This awareness can bring understanding between us and of course brings us much closer together.

Conflict allows for new shared ideas. The old expression comes to mind, “Two heads are better than one.” When we disagree, we can re-evaluate, compromise or adjust. No one is 100% wrong or right in any situation. It is often through the energy of conflict that some of the greatest breakthroughs come in relationships. Imagine if our best thoughts could be joined with the best thoughts of another!

However sometimes conflict becomes destructive.

Conflict becomes destructive when people stop talking about the difference and start attacking each other verbally or physically; or when the emotion primarily becomes anger and the other person is viewed as the enemy.

Conflict becomes destructive when it becomes a pattern and neither party wants to resolve anything. In other words, conflict is a way of venting selfish feelings. When the pressures of life become focused on someone innocent, conflict is harmful. For example, you’ve had a bad day at work and coming home you carry all that frustration. Now you cannot civilly express all that rage at the office so you do so at home. This is destructive.

Conflict becomes destructive when either selfishness or bitterness is the basis for your position or actions. To examine this a little, look back at your last conflict. What were you willing to give up to resolve the issue? When bitterness is present, every past conflict is dragged into this one and that makes it destructive.

Now we come to the final 3- making conflict useful.
Be open minded. Listen carefully to what the other person is saying. Try to ignore any strong emotions coming from them and try to hear the message. What exactly is the issue here? What really are they upset about?
Always push past the emotions and discomfort and ask yourself and the other person specifically what can be done to resolve this issue and this issue alone. How do we grow through this and when this circumstance comes up again, how can we find a solution more easily.

Finally, don’t be so surprised when conflict develops. It is actually quite normal. If you are one who finds if unbelievable that someone might not like you, your opinions or values, then you, my friend, are not in the real world!

The truth about life is that quality of life often comes from resolved conflicts and not the absence of conflict. So relax and don’t worry so much when others disagree or get upset. Just keep working on it. Understand that healthy relationships demand continual negotiation. When we stop that negotiation, relationships become shallow- we now only speak about safe things, things that never upsets anyone. Sometimes it takes conflict to keep us together and growing.

We are busy with the must-attend meetings, demands of family and friends and work, with daily routines that require attention… there is not much time left for “important” things.

Important things are the things that move us forward. Things that result in accomplishment. They are the measurable productive parts of our lives. I’m not suggesting that family, friends and work are not important. Rather that when life is just one activity after another it does feel empty after awhile. To balance this off I am also not suggesting that everything in life must be a measurable accomplishment but we do need some.

There is a lot of hidden tension between “busy” and “productive”. These two are not necessarily the same thing.

I’m sure you’ve had those days when you ran and rushed through the day, with barely enough time to take a deep breath- but at the end for that day, there wasn’t much measurable accomplished. You were just surviving from crisis to crisis or event to event.

The end result of this kind of living is stress- lots of stress. Plus fatigue, frustration and just plain tired- unusually tired.

Measurable accomplishment on the other hand, energizes and satisfies.

How do you get a handle of this?

PLAN EFFECTIVELY

You need to take time to plan. By planning, I don’t mean planning what to do with your time or just writing a “things to do list”. Most busy people already do that. It does help!

But rather determine what projects you need to get done- or what’s really important. Decide what people are really important and why. The people who are important to you need some quality time from you.

SCHEDULE YOUR ENERGY

Schedule the best energy of your day to that work or you’ll never get the important stuff done. If you are a morning person, do what’s IMPORTANT in the morning. If you’re an evening person, do your creative, important things in the evening.

PRIORITIZE

Prioritize meetings based where and when decisions will be made. Don’t have meetings just for the sake of meetings. Make them productive, decision-making events. If you get placed on a committee you did not choose, press everyone toward decisions, and not just discussion. For everyday activity think “important.”To prioritize is to define why this is important, why it’s important to you and why it’s important now.

MAKE IT MATTER TO YOU

You may say, “This really does not matter to me. I get paid, I go to work, it doesn’t really matter what I do for my company.”

“I have a ministry activity and I just do it. I do what I am told and let others do the thinking and decision-making.”

To live like this is deadly. By deadly I mean, your life has no heart. Activity has replaced initiative, creativity, enthusiasm and forward looking. Nothing ever feels accomplished, it’s just another day.

The problem with this. Without measurable accomplishment in work or ministry, you’ll eventually lose your drive and your energy will be diminished- and I might add, maybe even your health.

Make life important!

The stress of the routine without rewards will wear you out.

BOTTOM LINE:

If you don’t get done what needs to be done, you may well be overcommitted but underproductive.

CHANGE SOMETHING AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

Why are they saying it?

We all get talked about. If our response to gossip or commenting about us is always “I really don’t care what people think about me”, something’s wrong.

We should care what people say about us.

We should take this matter seriously. It does matter what people think and say about us- and underneath our tough exterior, I know we do care.

When I was much younger, I tended to assume that negative comments about me were the fault of the people who were making them. I chalked it to prejudice, persecution, jealousy, or their bad attitude. I would sometimes even assume it was the devil motivating people- like some vague form of spiritual warfare.

Now some of that may be true and does exist in life. This is not a world free of malice and jealousy and there is a devil.

However, more realistically, our words and actions are almost always the basis of how we are treated and talked about. We choose how we act. We choose what we say and the tone in which we say it. Most of the time, we are treated exactly as we deserve to be treated.

The Golden Rule of life is, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

We need to remember that for every action, there is a corresponding reaction. How much of our trouble with people is caused by our own actions? This too is the law of reaping and sowing. What we plant we reap. There is a direct connection between our actions and words and what happens to us.

The point of this is not to make you feel guilty about your life and its current troubles, but rather to suggest that if you consistently are gossiped about or treated negatively, you look at it seriously and honestly rather than dismissing it as something weird or demonic that happens.

Then- do something about it.

If you don’t like the harvest you are reaping, change what you are planting.

Sometimes we feel that “nasty” thing about us is necessary. We feel that to be the boss or to get people to obey, we have to be obnoxious.

I remember a friend of mine who had been in leadership for many years saying the following when instructing his secretary, “We always get what we want, but we do it in a nice way.”

For most of us, change is difficult. We may not even know what to change. I have a few thoughts about this.

First step: Get the truth about yourself from an honest objective friend.

If a lot of negative is swirling around your life, you need a friend to help you honestly understand how you are perceived. Ask them, “What am I doing wrong here?” That may take some real fortitude to be that honest. But sometimes we need to know the truth about how we come across.

Second step: make a plan of action.

You may have to change something in order for people to say different things about you. Sometimes a small change can make a big difference. Sometimes taking a course on human relationships helps. Or learning about conflict resolution.

Third step: think of this whole thing positively.

Say to your self, “If I change the way I treat people, they are going to change their behavior towards me.”

Finally: In essence, we have control over the way we will be treated in the future. It’s never to late to change…even a little.

Treat others as you would like to be treated. Talk to others the way you would like to be spoken to. You’ll see a big change! The Golden Rule works. Our behavior does affect the way we are treated.

Wanting to start off right, the young man entered the office of the much older manager and asked him for advice.

“How can I succeed as a manager?” he asked.

The older man gruffly said, “Two words. Good decisions”.

The young man, somewhat puzzled, then asked, “And how will I make good decisions?”

The older man replied, “Two words. Bad decisions.”

“Then how will i know the difference?”

“Experience.”

Good decisions are really a matter of experience. It’s like you have learned what not to do. As statistics tell us, most successful businessmen have failed or gone bankrupt at least twice.

Failure teaches you what doesn’t work. Hopefully you try to NOT repeat that failure too often.

However, if you are one who doesn’t want to learn everything the hard way, there are some guidelines that can help you make good or better decisions.

1.    Get the facts. More mistakes are made, more wrong directions chosen and more failures result from inadequate information than any other reason. Whether ministry, business or personal life decisions, we just don’t ask enough questions. If someone is pushing us to decide but is hesitant to clearly answer our questions, we should step back and take another look. We must do our homework and postpone the decision until we have all the facts.

2. Take time. We should trust our intuitive sense. When we feel any discomfort about moving forward with thIs, we should think again. It is true that some people have problems making decisions and they are always hesitant to take responsibility for decisions. But assuming we are somewhat self-confident, we should pay attention to our uneasiness.  When we see a stop sign in our mind, we must pay attention and stop. It may be a lack of information, too much pressure, or lack of credibility on the part of the presenter. Whatever it is, we must take some more time. Beware of ‘once in a lifetime’ opportunities. They are rarely what they are made out to be.

3. Beware of too much emotion. The goal of a salesman is to get the person to buy what he is selling, whether a marriage proposal, buying a property, car or whatever. A good salesman creates desire in the buyer. Watch the emotion. Emotion blinds common sense. Decisions made predominately by emotion usually are not well thought through and are eventually regretted. The reason we fall into bad deals is we often either wanted what was being sold or we were made to want what was being sold. Emotion is wonderful but rarely helpful in decision-making. If anyone will not let us think it over for a day, we should say no.

4. Get independent input. If the decision is important, we should get a third party opinion. Someone neutral, smart, objective. What we don’t see may be seen by another. If that is not good enough, then we may get a second or third opinion. I don’t mean talking this over with our best friends. I mean someone objective who has no personal interest in this transaction. This independent input should also be prayer. God guides people. BUT- prayer will not be enough if we are emotionally involved in this decision. Your emotions will somehow mesh with your spirit and you’ll think this emotion or feeling good is God talking. If we choose to pray after we have emotionally committed, I hate to say it but prayer may be a waste of time; we’ve already made up our mind.

5. Learn from your mistakes. Some of us make the same mistake over and over. Why? We do not learn from past mistakes. It’s always good for us to evaluate our mistakes before we leave them behind. I know it’s embarrassing to talk about our mistakes and very difficult to think them over. We just want to forget it. Without some analysis on our part, we will do the same thing next time. We should consider some ways to avoid this mistake next time- and there likely will be a next time. Sometimes in a bad relationship we just want to forget that person but forgetting the person does not mean we won’t fall for exactly the same kind of person again. So we should think about what went wrong and take some steps to prevent it next time.

So good decisions are well documentable, are not rushed, are not driven by emotion and will stand up to the scrutiny of an outside party.

Don’t worry about making a few mistakes.

Do keep learning.